“What choices can be made between two states, but one of which is clearly recognized? Who could be free to choose between effects, when only one is seen as up to him? An honest choice could never be perceived as one in which the choice is split between a tiny you and an enormous world, with different dreams about the truth in you. The gap between reality and dreams lies not between the dreaming of the world and what you DREAM IN SECRET. They are one. The dreaming of the world is but a part of your own dream you gave away, and saw as if it were its start and ending, both. Yet was it started by your SECRET DREAM, which you do not perceive although it caused the part you see and do not doubt is real. How could you doubt it while you lie asleep, and DREAM IN SECRET that its cause is real?
A brother separated from yourself, an ancient enemy, a murderer who stalks you in the night and plots your death, yet plans that it be lingering and slow; of this you dream. Yet underneath this dream is yet another, in which you become the murderer, the secret enemy, the scavenger and the destroyer of your brother and the world alike. Here is the cause of suffering, the space between your little dreams and your reality. The little gap you do not even see, the birthplace of illusions and of fear, the time of terror and of ancient hate, the instant of disaster, all are here. Here is the cause of unreality. And it is here that it will be undone.” (T-27.VII.11:1–12:6)
These words from the Course tell us what caused the dream of the world. Our secret dream. What is our secret dream which the world, we do not doubt is real, is covering up? That we are murderers, a secret enemy, scavengers and destroyers of our brothers and the world. That would be an apt description of the ego. So our secret dream, which is out of our awareness, is that we are the ego.
This secret dream is the cause of all suffering. This secret dream caused unreality. We dreamed an unreal world in which our brother, a separated self, was the enemy and the murderer to escape the dream that we were.
“You think you are the home of evil, darkness and sin. You think if anyone could see the truth about you he would be repelled, recoiling from you as if from a poisonous snake. You think if what is true about you were revealed to you, you would be struck with horror so intense that you would rush to death by your own hand, living on after seeing this being impossible.” (W-93.1:1-3)
And such is the self we made that is the foundation of the world. It is not real nor is the world. But we have chosen to believe it is our reality. We have covered our secret dream of our malevolence with the dream of the world. Then we forgot the causal secret dream. Then we choose to believe the world was real and covered it up with another dream, the face of innocence. These are all one dream with one purpose, to make our identification as the ego and the separation seem real.
So what are our choices as we journey home to God?
“What could you choose between but life or death, waking or sleeping, peace or war, your dreams or your reality?” (T-27.VII.10:1)
But how can we choose if we cannot see or understand the choices? Our problem is not the world but our belief that we are the self we made which we think is real. The world is covering up its cause. Our valuing it, having goals in it, looking at it as it were significant and participating in it as if it were real is a distraction from the real problem.
“Awaken and forget all thoughts of death, and you will find you have the peace of God. Yet if the choice is really given you, then you must see the causes of the things you choose between exactly as they are and where they are.” (T-27.VII.10:6-7)
The cause of the world is our secret dream which speaks to an identity problem. We believe we are something we made up and deny our Self. The undoing of this must be done where the cause is. In the mind, we believe we are this guilty self. This belief must be brought to truth. We cannot bring it to truth if it is hidden. We first must give up the belief in what is hiding it, the world. Our secret dream cannot be brought to truth if we still have no doubt that the world is real. How do we really know that we have decided to not believe the world is real?
“You are free to believe what you choose, and what you do attests to what you believe.” (T-1.II.1:9)
“All other traits of God’s teachers rest on trust. Once that has been achieved, the others cannot fail to follow. Only the trusting can afford honesty, for only they can see its value. Honesty does not apply only to what you say. The term actually means consistency. There is nothing you say that contradicts what you think or do; no thought opposes any other thought; no act belies your word; and no word lacks agreement with another. Such are the truly honest. At no level are they in conflict with themselves. Therefore it is impossible for them to be in conflict with anyone or anything.” (M-4.II.1:1-9)
Our actions belie our beliefs. Beware of the, “I believe but…”