We have one relationship.

We have one job.

Our one relationship is with the Holy Spirit.

Our one job is to do what He instructs us to do, say and think.

We, as mind, think we have a relationship with the ego.

We, as our little made-up self concepts, think we have relationships with other personality selves. (which could only ever be a reflection of our relationship with the ego)

Our relationship with the ego is filled with gaslighting, control, manipulation, suspiciousness, viciousness, demands, threats and condemnation. It is a picture of co-dependency and narcissism. The ego is our accuser, our tormentor and wants us dead.

Our relationships with other personality selves are reflections of our relationship with the ego covered by a face of innocence. Learn that now or learn it later. Remember, the ego once was our seeming friend and savior. This phenomenon of covering up the hellish, with a distraction of seeming innocence, is discussed in Psychotherapy in the section entitled VI. The Definition of Healing. Here is an excerpt.

The strange distortions woven inextricably into the self-concept, itself but a pseudo-creation, make this ugly sound seem truly beautiful. “The rhythm of the universe,” “the herald angel’s song,” all these and more are heard instead of loud discordant shrieks. (We are shrieking a song of death and destruction, screaming at God to stay out of our kingdom. We interpret this discordant dirge as a lovely melody we sing in joy.)

The ear translates; it does not hear. The eye reproduces; it does not see. Their task is to make agreeable whatever is called on, however disagreeable it may be. (P-2.VI.2:5–3:4)

Our relationship with the Holy Spirit is the exact opposite of our relationship with the ego. The Holy Spirit is the perfect parent. He is our Guide, our Comforter, our Therapist, our Teacher, our Provider and our Friend until we remember what we are. Until we heal and reclaim our awareness of Heaven and God, He will walk with us as we travel home to God. He will give us guidance, peace and sure direction. The Holy Spirit loves us beyond measure. He wants nothing but to share everything. He is the Voice for God. His Will is ours and God’s. (For a fuller description of our relationship with the Holy Spirit read the epilogue of the workbook.)

All we need to do to claim this supportive and loving relationship is to have faith, belief and trust in Him. We must learn to ask the Holy Spirit everything. All decisions are made with the ego or the Holy Spirit. If we don’t ask the Holy Spirit, by default, we are making decisions with the ego.

We trust our ways to Him and say “Amen.” In peace we will continue in His way, and trust all things to Him. In confidence we wait His answers, as we ask His Will in everything we do. (W-ep.6:1-3)

We must train our minds to listen to the Holy Spirit. It is not inherent in the mind. We must be vigilant against our predilection to listen to the ego’s incessant instructions and interpretations. This is a precursor of being able to think with the Holy Spirit. For example, do not listen to the ego saying, “How do you know that is the Holy Spirit speaking?” It is never about the answer. It is always about the practice of asking. We are not asking the Holy Spirit for a particular outcome. We are exercising our listen to the Holy Spirit muscle. We are breaking the habit of reflexively obeying the ego. There is such an incredible peace and joy that comes with asking the Holy Spirit everything and following His guidance.

Do not, then, think that following the Holy Spirit’s guidance is necessary merely because of your own inadequacies. It is the way out of hell for you. (M-29.3:10-11)

Both the voice of the ego and the Voice for God are always talking to us. We have trained ourselves to listen only to the ego. We have trained ourselves to drown out the Voice of the Holy Spirit. We must train ourselves only to listen to the Voice of the Holy Spirit and to obey that Voice.

I am not a body. I am free. I hear the Voice that God has given me, and it is only this my mind obeys. (W-199.8:7-9)


We have trained our minds to obey the voice of the ego which has resulted in hell on earth. This hell on earth has been camouflaged by a thick layer of “the face of innocence.” We no longer “experience” the intense unbearable agony and panic of the separation. But it is still there, beneath the saccharin lifeless surface we refer to as life. We prefer this living death to walking through the fear layer that it covers. That fear is waiting to be walked through when we are ready. To get home to God we must and will take that journey, but we will need our Guide.

And now I place you in His hands, to be His faithful follower, with Him as Guide through every difficulty and all pain that you may think is real. (W-ep.4:1)

We are in an “abusive” relationship with the ego. Leaving an abusive relationship seems rational but the mind that is engaged in it is not rational. Just as with any addictive behavior, stopping something that is causing pain sounds sane. But the mind participating in the addiction is not sane. It is a mind consumed with fear, denial, projection, pain and guilt. The addict mind believes their salvation lies in the substance, the activity or the relationship. This mirrors the separation story which is the model for all stories. We turned to the ego to save us from a vengeful abandoning God and the agony of our guilt. The ego and the ego thought system have been labeled as salvation. Why would we leave what we believe is “saving” us?

So how do we “leave” our “abusive” relationship with the ego? In an abusive relationship power is not taken it is given. We made the ego and gave it our power. We conferred with the ego about everything until we forgot what we were. Learn to ask the ego nothing. Ask the Holy Spirit everything. Ask Him what to do, say and think and be willing to follow His instructions.

I am here only to be truly helpful.
I am here to represent Him Who sent me.
I do not have to worry about what to say or what to do, because He Who sent me will direct me.
I am content to be wherever He wishes, knowing He goes there with me.
I will be healed as I let Him teach me to heal. (T-2.V-A.18:2-6)

It will not be easy. There will be fear to walk through. There will be fear to sit in. There will be ego backlash. The ego will attempt to reel us back in at every turn. But the Holy Spirit will be with us every step of the way. The real reason that asking the Holy Spirit everything terrifies the ego is because it loses control. After all, who is the us asking the Holy Spirit and for what purpose? In the simple asking of the Holy Spirit what to do, say and think we step away from our identification as a body and personality self and declare ourselves a servant of God instead of a slave to the ego. We align with our true self. We align ourselves with our one Voice. We declare ourselves free.

The road to freedom is not free. It will cost us all of our illusions. When each of us is ready to leave our abuser, we will know. In the meantime, prepare. Read the Course, do the lessons and practice listening and following our one Voice. We are all, whether we realize it or not, laying the foundation for the Great Awakening, the great sobering, the return to sense.